The truck arrives tomorrow and then the real fun begins. Given the 3872 variables involved, I'm guessing I'll be out of Internet contact for a couple of days. So have a great weekend. Oh, and Giacomo... I changed my profile.
Friday, June 29, 2007
Moving Day
The truck arrives tomorrow and then the real fun begins. Given the 3872 variables involved, I'm guessing I'll be out of Internet contact for a couple of days. So have a great weekend. Oh, and Giacomo... I changed my profile.
Yes, I'd like to file a missing persons report for one, Isiah Thomas
There were lots of surprising moments in last night's NBA Draft (not the least of which being that the majority of teams made seemingly good decisions for once), but none more so than Zeke somehow pulling off a deal that brought a solid young player to the Knicks AND dumped the massive salary of one of the team's 117 guards. The Knicks get Zach Randolph, Dan Dickau, and Fred Jones for Channing Frye and the personification of shitty GM-ship that is Steve Francis.
Holy shit, what exactly is happening here?
Much as I hate Isiah, I have to admit that his Draft Day actions tend to be far superior to his every-single-other-day-of-the-year actions. Despite much criticism at the time, the last two year's late first-round picks* of David Lee and Renaldo Balkman have proven surprisingly solid. And I kind of love yesterday's moves. Including getting the raw, but undeniably talented, Wilson Chandler at pick #23.
It's an open question whether Randolph and Eddy Curry can play effectively together, but it's a much less open question than whether or not it's possible for a team with more than $100 million in guards to succeed.
Despite some serious behavior issues in Portland, Randolph has proven a low-post force. I see Randolph as even more of a factor in the East and a likely 25+ points and 10+ rebounds guy. Which is awesome. That is if he can stay away from guns, drugs and violence. Which should be easy in New York. Right?
All things considered, I have to say, um, way to go Isiah. Ugh, gotta go take a shower now.
*Though I hasten to add that incredibly shitty GM-ship is precisely the reason why a terrible team like the Knicks has been picking at the end of the first round instead of the beginning. Phew, that feels better.
Thursday, June 28, 2007
Two Great Tastes that Taste Great Together
Regular readers know that friend of the blog, Luke Burbank is launching a brand new NPR show this fall called (at least for now) The Bryant Park Project. Well today they taped (and posted) their first episode. Well, kind of. The Pilot episode is an hour long and it's for Internet only. But a good source and popular legend have it that it's a pretty good example of what the show's going to sound like. And I'm a fan.
Then again, I'm a little biased. Listen closely (or not that closely) from minutes 8:30 to 17 and you'll hear a little of, well, me. I joined Luke, Alison and USA Today Tech Correspondent, Ed Baig for a little iPhone discussion/review.
"How the hell did you get to be an iPhone expert?" you condescendingly snarl.
Now that I'm a multimedia star I'm going to avoid descending into the gutter and simply not respond. But fuck you.
Anyway, give the Pilot a listen or sign up for the podcast and send a little love BPP's way.
Last week I complained about ads I hated...
Namely the new VW ads featuring my beloved Wilco. In an attempt to stop the hate, Mark H. sent me some very funny ads that I don't hate at all.
And here they are. The campaign is for New Mexico tourism and the agency is M&C Saatchi, right here in Los Angeles.
Don't worry, I'll find something else to hate very soon. Probably you.
And here they are. The campaign is for New Mexico tourism and the agency is M&C Saatchi, right here in Los Angeles.
Don't worry, I'll find something else to hate very soon. Probably you.
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Blitzen Trapper Week Continues
Hope you have your seizure medicine handy. Oh, and your herpes medicine.
Apparently there's something about an iPhone coming up
As you know, I've been aquiver since moment one.
The answer is yes, I will be doing my damndest to get ahold of one on Friday. Not willing to camp out with other humps like me, I plan on failing.
But fear not, I will have one and a report on its relative awesomeness as soon as is conveniently possible.
Until then, check this cool demo out. I'm ready to be convinced that the virtual keyboard is the way to go. Then again, I'm also ready to be convinced that Steve Jobs shits gold nuggets. I'm discerning like that.
Now if we could just do something about the brutally slow EDGE network. Sigh. Again.
Next stop...some other Colorado mountain town
Of the many awesome moments at last weekend's Mark V Bachelorstravaganza, one stood out (at least for me). Arriving to enjoy a group dinner at one Old Dillon Inn, I was struck by the stage full of seemingly owner-less instruments. Inspired by alcohol, altitude and who the hell knows what else, we inquired as the possibility of the band (AKA, Mark, Casey and myself) stepping onstage and doing a few songs.
I pretty much expected a firm and resolute "HELL NO!" Instead we got thoughtful consideration and ultimately a shocking acceptance.
That's the point where the three of us began to utterly panic.
Cut to 40 minutes later and Frank from Lucky La Rue gives us (playing under the pseudonym, Tall Cotton) a very nice introduction. We make our way up on stage and well, I'll let the video tell the rest of the story.
In our (and I really mean "my") defense:
1) Due to my travel and work schedule, we had not played together in two months.
2) The gear we were playing on was totally unfamiliar.
3) We were nervous as shit. I mean REALLY, REALLY nervous. Mark-V-admitting-he-was-nervous nervous.
Enjoy. And yes, we do Bar Mitzvahs.
Song 1: Wilco's I'm Always In Love
Song 2: Our very own Whole Towns
I pretty much expected a firm and resolute "HELL NO!" Instead we got thoughtful consideration and ultimately a shocking acceptance.
That's the point where the three of us began to utterly panic.
Cut to 40 minutes later and Frank from Lucky La Rue gives us (playing under the pseudonym, Tall Cotton) a very nice introduction. We make our way up on stage and well, I'll let the video tell the rest of the story.
In our (and I really mean "my") defense:
1) Due to my travel and work schedule, we had not played together in two months.
2) The gear we were playing on was totally unfamiliar.
3) We were nervous as shit. I mean REALLY, REALLY nervous. Mark-V-admitting-he-was-nervous nervous.
Enjoy. And yes, we do Bar Mitzvahs.
Song 1: Wilco's I'm Always In Love
Song 2: Our very own Whole Towns
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
Some online marketing awesomeness
Curt's boys at Glaceau have put together a very cool viral Web site for Vitamin Water.
I'll let you check it out for yourself. Curt's message to me involved a $10,000 bet and a half a bottle of Maker's Mark. Ah, bachelor party memories.
Oh look, a message for you!
I'll let you check it out for yourself. Curt's message to me involved a $10,000 bet and a half a bottle of Maker's Mark. Ah, bachelor party memories.
Oh look, a message for you!
Monday, June 25, 2007
Rock Out With Your Cock Out Mondays - Blitzen Trapper
Monday afternoons are usually pretty slow around these here blog parts. With the previous week's Caption Contest judged and the new one posted, I usually put my feet up and simultaneously pat myself on the back. It goes further than that sometimes, but a man needs secrets, right?Anyhoo. This week that familiar, but boring routine takes a wild turn for the awesome. I finally figured out how to link to mp3's off of the blog. And so I proudly announce the first of many Rock Out With Your Cock Out Mondays. Each week I'll post song that's been on heavy-duty repeat in my world.* Then you can spend the week rocking with your proverbial cock out. (Note, I said proverbial. Mark H I'm looking at you.)
Oh yeah, and Mark H. was the triumphant winner for Week 62. Nice work, as always.
This week's band is Blitzen Trapper. Mark V, Casey, Mindy and I saw them open for The Hold Steady last month and were of completely differing opinions. I really liked them, Mindy seemed ambivalent, Casey was generally positive and Mark pretty much hated them. In his defense, some of their stuff was pretty chaotic. That said, we all kind of liked the countrified stuff best. And so here is the countrified title track off of their new album, Wild Mountain Nation. Enjoy!
Wild Mountain by Blitzen Trapper.
*Yes I know that The Bryant Park Project and tons of other sites do something similar, but come on, how much trail can one man blaze? And besides, my taste is better.
TPUTV(OE)CC,PBE - Week 63
...Now.
This week we return to the familiar cartoon confines of Heaven. And now that the solstice is behind us and the long descent into cruel, cruel winter has begun, I'm seriously hoping you'll all give up summer frivolity and park yourselves in front of your computers for some serious entry writing.
Have 'em in by Sunday night, keep 'em anonymous. Good luck! Oh, and remember you can click on the cartoon to get a bigger view of it. Yes, I agree it's kind of small this week. God we're getting old.
Now let's get it on!*
*And let's also begin this week's contest.
This week we return to the familiar cartoon confines of Heaven. And now that the solstice is behind us and the long descent into cruel, cruel winter has begun, I'm seriously hoping you'll all give up summer frivolity and park yourselves in front of your computers for some serious entry writing.
Have 'em in by Sunday night, keep 'em anonymous. Good luck! Oh, and remember you can click on the cartoon to get a bigger view of it. Yes, I agree it's kind of small this week. God we're getting old.
Now let's get it on!*
*And let's also begin this week's contest.
The "Pump up the Volume (of Entries)!" Caption Contest, Presented by Ejaculoid - Week 62 Results
Well, I'm just back from mantastic fun of Mark V's bachelor party in picturesque Silverthorne, Colorado (more on that in later posts), and and looking at the extreme novelty to two straight weeks at home! Despite that fact that our move has to happen in that same time period, I'm looking forward to returning to my regular schedule and getting back to doing some posting!
Anyway, back to this week's contest. After not posting in almost a week, there is no way in hell I'm going to complain about a relatively paltry 15 entries (see how I did that?). Considering that a significant of my regular entrants were with me in CO and out of Internet contact, it's really not to much of a surprise (see how I continue to do that?).
Despite having only 15 entries (Jesus, when am I going to stop??, we got some very good ones. And here, in my humble opinion, they are...
"Look at those drumsticks!" - Short and sweet. But pretty funny.
“… after which the Chippendale will finish with the crowd-pleasing ‘dirty bird bump n’ grind.’” - This was the best execution of the reading-from-the-Audubon-guide genre.
"Nah, it can't be a Redwood, silly. Those leaves are indicative of a Mountain Alder." - Do I even need to explain why I love this one?
“The ironic thing, if you think about it, is that he’s actually being more modest than all the naked birds we’ve been seeing.” - A very solid reversal of perspective. Always appreciated.
"The rare Sunbathing Swallow. Like Paris Hilton, it does both." - Not even sure how funny I think this is, but the writerly crafting is spot-on. A tip of the cap to you, sir or madam. Is it just me or does this feel like a Henny Youngman line? In a good way.
"Is it wrong that I'm kinda turned on?" - Is is wrong that a bestiality joke pretty much automatically launches you into the finals?
Okay, so there we have it and here, in my somewhat less humble opinion is your winner:
"Nah, it can't be a Redwood, silly. Those leaves are indicative of a Mountain Alder."
Nice work, Anonymous. I'm a bit of a sucker for the ignoring-the-obvious brand of humor. Let me know who you are and we can torment the other entrants with your greatness.
Now let's get some more entries for Week 63, which begins right...
Anyway, back to this week's contest. After not posting in almost a week, there is no way in hell I'm going to complain about a relatively paltry 15 entries (see how I did that?). Considering that a significant of my regular entrants were with me in CO and out of Internet contact, it's really not to much of a surprise (see how I continue to do that?).
Despite having only 15 entries (Jesus, when am I going to stop??, we got some very good ones. And here, in my humble opinion, they are...
"Look at those drumsticks!" - Short and sweet. But pretty funny.
“… after which the Chippendale will finish with the crowd-pleasing ‘dirty bird bump n’ grind.’” - This was the best execution of the reading-from-the-Audubon-guide genre.
"Nah, it can't be a Redwood, silly. Those leaves are indicative of a Mountain Alder." - Do I even need to explain why I love this one?
“The ironic thing, if you think about it, is that he’s actually being more modest than all the naked birds we’ve been seeing.” - A very solid reversal of perspective. Always appreciated.
"The rare Sunbathing Swallow. Like Paris Hilton, it does both." - Not even sure how funny I think this is, but the writerly crafting is spot-on. A tip of the cap to you, sir or madam. Is it just me or does this feel like a Henny Youngman line? In a good way.
"Is it wrong that I'm kinda turned on?" - Is is wrong that a bestiality joke pretty much automatically launches you into the finals?
Okay, so there we have it and here, in my somewhat less humble opinion is your winner:
"Nah, it can't be a Redwood, silly. Those leaves are indicative of a Mountain Alder."
Nice work, Anonymous. I'm a bit of a sucker for the ignoring-the-obvious brand of humor. Let me know who you are and we can torment the other entrants with your greatness.
Now let's get some more entries for Week 63, which begins right...
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Love these songs, HATE these ads
I really haven't loved much of the new VW work in the time since the account moved from Arnold to Crispin. The work isn't bad, but it lacks the magic that so many of the Arnold spots had.
I absolutely hated the campaign that's been running for the last few months trumpeting "3 VW's under $17,000" as reason enough to make beat poets and End-is-near sign-toters see the world in a suddenly positive light. Lame. Just ad-y and lame.
And, speaking of lame, we now have this campaign which I started seeing just this morning on ESPN (live blogging, baby! feel the excitement). The ads all use songs from Wilco's latest album, Sky Blue Sky. And that's the only good part. The way they're shot, the way they're acted, the voiceover - it's all terrible in my opinion. They look like shitty student ads we always see on new director's reels. The execution is clunky and, despite being a huge fan of the album, the music seems a bit forced into the ad.
There is one more, not pictured here, featuring the EOS and the opening strains of "What Light." I'll see if I can find it online today. It's the only one where the music seems to really fit. That said, the ad is still pretty awful.
Take a look and let me know what you think. I'd be curious to know if I'm the only one who hates these.
I absolutely hated the campaign that's been running for the last few months trumpeting "3 VW's under $17,000" as reason enough to make beat poets and End-is-near sign-toters see the world in a suddenly positive light. Lame. Just ad-y and lame.
And, speaking of lame, we now have this campaign which I started seeing just this morning on ESPN (live blogging, baby! feel the excitement). The ads all use songs from Wilco's latest album, Sky Blue Sky. And that's the only good part. The way they're shot, the way they're acted, the voiceover - it's all terrible in my opinion. They look like shitty student ads we always see on new director's reels. The execution is clunky and, despite being a huge fan of the album, the music seems a bit forced into the ad.
There is one more, not pictured here, featuring the EOS and the opening strains of "What Light." I'll see if I can find it online today. It's the only one where the music seems to really fit. That said, the ad is still pretty awful.
Take a look and let me know what you think. I'd be curious to know if I'm the only one who hates these.
When you put it that way
So instead of slogging through a 95 degree, 18-hole playoff against Angel Cabrera, Tiger Woods spent his Monday watching his first child be born.
Suddenly that second-place finish looks pretty damn good.
Genetic superiority, your name is Sam Alexis Woods.
Suddenly that second-place finish looks pretty damn good.
Genetic superiority, your name is Sam Alexis Woods.
Monday, June 18, 2007
Oakmont - Day Six
Father's Day Sunday at the US Open. It's hard to describe the awesomeness. I feel incredibly lucky to have been there to soak up the experience and see the final round. It was an amazing week and Sunday was no different.
I got to the course at about 10:30 and things were surprisingly calm. I spent the first few hours of the day lingering around the Lexus tent on #3 and made one final trip to the airplane hangar that was the Merchandise Tent. My guess is that USGA brought in approximately $123,327,875,943,375,421,003,284,550,074 in merchandise sales alone. I'm also guessing that most patrons followed my path through the week. Merch. Tent visit #1: Look around, note a few items of interest, get a feel for the place, buy a shirt. Visit #2: Buy all the stuff you noted last time plus a few gifts. Visit #3: Buy more stuff for no apparent reason. Visit #4: make your way through the clean-picked shelves and try to convince yourself that you need a US Open Members Only jacket.
But back to golf. So Paul and I had a plan for the day and it started with making our way to the grandstand behind the 5th hole at 2:00. With water and beer in hands, we found two great seats and camped in the 85-degree heat for the last eight or nine groups of golfers coming through. The seats were perfect because we could see the drives from #4, the approach and putts on #5 and the tee shot on #6. Not to mention the fact that they were seats and we actually got off of our feet for a few hours. But maybe most importantly, the seats had a clear view of a leaderboard.
And that was pretty key given that during our few hours at #5 no less than 10 players moved to within a shot of the lead (then at +4). Steve Stricker looked like he was going to set the world on fire when he went back-to-back birdies on 5 and 6. But, like so many others yesterday, he fell a bit apart as he got to the back 9. Cabrera birdied 4 and 5, but I don't think any of us really expected him to be able to hold on.
The big reason was that despite double-bogeying #3 (ouch) Tiger looked good as he came through our area. He birdied #4 and made huge par saves at 5 and 6. As Tiger passed, we left our seats and tried to jump ahead of the insane crush to cross the bridge over the Penn Turnpike and get to the backside of the course. We got stuck in the crowd though and watched Tiger par #7.
Eventually we made our way over to the corner of #'s 15, 16 and 17. The course layout lets you see significant portions of all three holes by just moving a few hundred feet. It was the perfect spot to see Furyk and Cabrera roll through.
We watched Furyk light fire via the scoreboard (birdies at 13 and 14). Then saw him stick his approach shot on 15 and log his third red number in a row. We also saw Cabrera birdie 15.
At that point we could see the zombie Tiger army cresting the hill and making their assembled massive way toward our position. We made the decision to race to 18 and setup to see the last three groups finish the day.
At the point it looked certain that Furyk or Cabrera would take the day. But not so fast!
Furyk made a Mickelsonian decision and tried to drive the green on 17. He missed badly and ended up bogeying himself into a terrible position going into the last hole. But Cabrera looked pretty damn human too, bogeying 16 AND 17.
We watched as Cabrera tapped in for a par at 18 and suddenly we're sitting on 18 awaiting Tiger who now has two holes to get one birdie and force a playoff. Holy fucking shit!
But, as you no doubt know, it just wasn't to be. Tiger parred the last 7 holes of the day. Many of them involved heroic saves, but he just wasn't able to grind for that one birdie that would have had him playing today. It's impossible not to think about the 6 or 7 BARELY missed putts on Saturday that would have given him an easy win.
I would have given anything to see Tiger win, but the week amazing nonetheless. Congrats to Angel Cabrera. He played well all week and earned his win with some tough holes early in the day.
The 2007 US Open is history and so am I. On my way to the airport now.
What a week.
(Sorry for any typos. Racing to checkout. I'll fix them later today...)
I got to the course at about 10:30 and things were surprisingly calm. I spent the first few hours of the day lingering around the Lexus tent on #3 and made one final trip to the airplane hangar that was the Merchandise Tent. My guess is that USGA brought in approximately $123,327,875,943,375,421,003,284,550,074 in merchandise sales alone. I'm also guessing that most patrons followed my path through the week. Merch. Tent visit #1: Look around, note a few items of interest, get a feel for the place, buy a shirt. Visit #2: Buy all the stuff you noted last time plus a few gifts. Visit #3: Buy more stuff for no apparent reason. Visit #4: make your way through the clean-picked shelves and try to convince yourself that you need a US Open Members Only jacket.
But back to golf. So Paul and I had a plan for the day and it started with making our way to the grandstand behind the 5th hole at 2:00. With water and beer in hands, we found two great seats and camped in the 85-degree heat for the last eight or nine groups of golfers coming through. The seats were perfect because we could see the drives from #4, the approach and putts on #5 and the tee shot on #6. Not to mention the fact that they were seats and we actually got off of our feet for a few hours. But maybe most importantly, the seats had a clear view of a leaderboard.
And that was pretty key given that during our few hours at #5 no less than 10 players moved to within a shot of the lead (then at +4). Steve Stricker looked like he was going to set the world on fire when he went back-to-back birdies on 5 and 6. But, like so many others yesterday, he fell a bit apart as he got to the back 9. Cabrera birdied 4 and 5, but I don't think any of us really expected him to be able to hold on.
The big reason was that despite double-bogeying #3 (ouch) Tiger looked good as he came through our area. He birdied #4 and made huge par saves at 5 and 6. As Tiger passed, we left our seats and tried to jump ahead of the insane crush to cross the bridge over the Penn Turnpike and get to the backside of the course. We got stuck in the crowd though and watched Tiger par #7.
Eventually we made our way over to the corner of #'s 15, 16 and 17. The course layout lets you see significant portions of all three holes by just moving a few hundred feet. It was the perfect spot to see Furyk and Cabrera roll through.
We watched Furyk light fire via the scoreboard (birdies at 13 and 14). Then saw him stick his approach shot on 15 and log his third red number in a row. We also saw Cabrera birdie 15.
At that point we could see the zombie Tiger army cresting the hill and making their assembled massive way toward our position. We made the decision to race to 18 and setup to see the last three groups finish the day.
At the point it looked certain that Furyk or Cabrera would take the day. But not so fast!
Furyk made a Mickelsonian decision and tried to drive the green on 17. He missed badly and ended up bogeying himself into a terrible position going into the last hole. But Cabrera looked pretty damn human too, bogeying 16 AND 17.
We watched as Cabrera tapped in for a par at 18 and suddenly we're sitting on 18 awaiting Tiger who now has two holes to get one birdie and force a playoff. Holy fucking shit!
But, as you no doubt know, it just wasn't to be. Tiger parred the last 7 holes of the day. Many of them involved heroic saves, but he just wasn't able to grind for that one birdie that would have had him playing today. It's impossible not to think about the 6 or 7 BARELY missed putts on Saturday that would have given him an easy win.
I would have given anything to see Tiger win, but the week amazing nonetheless. Congrats to Angel Cabrera. He played well all week and earned his win with some tough holes early in the day.
The 2007 US Open is history and so am I. On my way to the airport now.
What a week.
(Sorry for any typos. Racing to checkout. I'll fix them later today...)
The "Pump up the Volume (of Entries)!" Caption Contest, Presented by Ejaculoid - Week 62
Animals who act like people! Get it!?! That's right, we're back on a theme. Luckily it's a pretty funny one.
Not to put any pressure on you all, but I expect your entries to be so funny that I cry until blood comes out of my eyes. Sound fair?
Have your entries in by Sunday night. Keep 'em anonymous.
Good luck!
Not to put any pressure on you all, but I expect your entries to be so funny that I cry until blood comes out of my eyes. Sound fair?
Have your entries in by Sunday night. Keep 'em anonymous.
Good luck!
The "Pump up the Volume (of Entries)!" Caption Contest, Presented by Ejaculoid - Week 60/61 Results
Well, well, well. Give you guys an extra week and... well, pretty much nothing happens. Fair enough. Luckily there were some good entries scattered over the two weeks though.
Here are my favs:
"he's such an uncle rex." - Funny as shit and setting a high bar right out of the gate. Regular readers know I'm a sucker for Harriet Beecher Stowe references. That or anthropomorphic race allegories.
"trust me, it's better than the last time he decided to play with himself." - Oh and masturbating jokes.
"you know, last week he tried to get me to fetch his newspaper and slippers. the nerve!" - Solidly done version of a common theme in the entries. An "asshole" instead of "the nerve" or even, "bitch" might have put this one into the lead.
"Dogs live their lives in fear, you know." - Much to the chagrin of everyone else, I reward an inside joke. Well done.
"Poor guy. He has to keep himself entertained since he can't lick his butthole." - I'm not sure why this dog is any different than all his peers, but I feel his pain. I wish the caption would have suggested a cause for this turn.
"Thank God it's his tail wagging like that." - I'm not really a high road kind of guy when it comes to captions. This one kept making me laugh.
"Who does that bitch think she is?" - Simple and funny.
"You should see when she beats herself with a rolled up newspaper." - Not sure why, but this one really appealed to me. I just liked the idea of the dog working out all of the human behaviors, even the shitty ones.
Okay, so there you have it. And, because the nation is DYING to know, your winner is:
"He's such an Uncle Rex."
Nice work, Anonymous. It was a tough choice, but the wagging tail and the pure, unadulterated enthusiasm of the dog aced this one for me. I love the idea that fetch is selling out to the man. Let me know who you are and I'll let everyone know what a funny S.O.B. you really are.
Thanks for entering!
Here are my favs:
"he's such an uncle rex." - Funny as shit and setting a high bar right out of the gate. Regular readers know I'm a sucker for Harriet Beecher Stowe references. That or anthropomorphic race allegories.
"trust me, it's better than the last time he decided to play with himself." - Oh and masturbating jokes.
"you know, last week he tried to get me to fetch his newspaper and slippers. the nerve!" - Solidly done version of a common theme in the entries. An "asshole" instead of "the nerve" or even, "bitch" might have put this one into the lead.
"Dogs live their lives in fear, you know." - Much to the chagrin of everyone else, I reward an inside joke. Well done.
"Poor guy. He has to keep himself entertained since he can't lick his butthole." - I'm not sure why this dog is any different than all his peers, but I feel his pain. I wish the caption would have suggested a cause for this turn.
"Thank God it's his tail wagging like that." - I'm not really a high road kind of guy when it comes to captions. This one kept making me laugh.
"Who does that bitch think she is?" - Simple and funny.
"You should see when she beats herself with a rolled up newspaper." - Not sure why, but this one really appealed to me. I just liked the idea of the dog working out all of the human behaviors, even the shitty ones.
Okay, so there you have it. And, because the nation is DYING to know, your winner is:
"He's such an Uncle Rex."
Nice work, Anonymous. It was a tough choice, but the wagging tail and the pure, unadulterated enthusiasm of the dog aced this one for me. I love the idea that fetch is selling out to the man. Let me know who you are and I'll let everyone know what a funny S.O.B. you really are.
Thanks for entering!
Saturday, June 16, 2007
Oakmont - Day Five
Blah, blah, blah, blah...blah.
Let me save us both some time. Got to course. Did stuff. Ate stuff. Watched stuff. Urinated out stuff...
FOLLOWED TIGER FROM #2 TO #7, WITNESSING TWO BIRDIES AND 6 HOLES OF THE ABSOLUTE BEST BALL-STRIKING DAY IN US OPEN HISTORY SINCE MILLER'S FINAL OAKMONT ROUND IN 1973.
If you know me you know what a massive Tiger fan I am and you can fathom how incredible today was. He missed 7 potential birdie putts by a combined 12 inches. He was totally dialed in and, short of the missed putting opportunities, looked absolutely inhuman.
Have I mentioned that I love Tiger?
Only a bad drive and resulting bogey (THE FIRST OF THE DAY) on 18 cost him a share of the lead.
Tomorrow's final pairing, Aaron Baddeley and Tiger Woods. Woods is 2 shots down and has never won a major coming from behind. I strongly feel that tomorrow will be the first time.
Tiger was a machine today and I think he'll enter tomorrow mad and hungry.
In case I haven't said it yet, I am beyond grateful to be seeing this live.
Tomorrow's plan - Paul and I camp on the #5 grandstand for the first few hours of the day and then follow the leaders (TIGER!) through the finish at 18.
OHMIGOD!
That is all. For now.
Oh, and call your dad and tell him you love him tomorrow.
Let me save us both some time. Got to course. Did stuff. Ate stuff. Watched stuff. Urinated out stuff...
FOLLOWED TIGER FROM #2 TO #7, WITNESSING TWO BIRDIES AND 6 HOLES OF THE ABSOLUTE BEST BALL-STRIKING DAY IN US OPEN HISTORY SINCE MILLER'S FINAL OAKMONT ROUND IN 1973.
If you know me you know what a massive Tiger fan I am and you can fathom how incredible today was. He missed 7 potential birdie putts by a combined 12 inches. He was totally dialed in and, short of the missed putting opportunities, looked absolutely inhuman.
Have I mentioned that I love Tiger?
Only a bad drive and resulting bogey (THE FIRST OF THE DAY) on 18 cost him a share of the lead.
Tomorrow's final pairing, Aaron Baddeley and Tiger Woods. Woods is 2 shots down and has never won a major coming from behind. I strongly feel that tomorrow will be the first time.
Tiger was a machine today and I think he'll enter tomorrow mad and hungry.
In case I haven't said it yet, I am beyond grateful to be seeing this live.
Tomorrow's plan - Paul and I camp on the #5 grandstand for the first few hours of the day and then follow the leaders (TIGER!) through the finish at 18.
OHMIGOD!
That is all. For now.
Oh, and call your dad and tell him you love him tomorrow.
Oakmont - Day Four
9:30 dinners, 5:30 alarms and 10-hour days in the baking sun are catching up with me. I expect exactly ZERO sympathy when I declare... I'M BEAT. Though it may be the two massive glasses of wine my waiter poured doing the talking.
Today was, no surprise here, awesome as shit.
Day four for me (two for the Open) started with the 8:00 AM shuttle to Oakmont. Given that most of the big players (and I'm not just talking about Phil's chest... HEY-OH!) had later starting times, the traffic was mercifully light on the way in.
When we got to the course (we being myself and Al from Team One), we swung by the Lexus consumer tent. Proving to be a massive hit with attendees, the tent includes the opportunity to have your picture taken with the absurdly expensive replica of the Championship Cup I referenced on Day 2 and an absolutely awesome virtual version of Oakmont's par-3 #6 (Here's a bonus pic from earlier in the week).
Both features have drawn long lines all week. But early enough in the morning, we were able to take a swing at the par-3 without standing in line for an hour. Al went first and hit the ball to a very respectable 11 feet. I was next and what happened next is yet another sad, sad case of all my glory being virtual. My ball sailed into the green, rolled by the cup (missing an ace by what looked like an inch) and then checking up and rolling back to just inside 12 inches. The resulting roar of the assembled attendees brought people running over and turned me into an instant golf celeb. It was pretty awesome. The Lexus tent employees raced over to collect my info for the end-of-day prize. It pained me mightily to inform them I'd concepted the tent activities and was thereby disqualified from winning. SHIT! But it was a pretty heady few minutes.
I spent the rest of the day cruising around the course and periodically making my way back to the Lexus luxury tent for water, AC and frozen fruit bars. Al, Paul and I found a perfect secret-squirrel spot between #'s 6 and 7 that let us watch the drives off of 4, approaches and putts on 5, the entire #6 and drives on 7. Absolutely perfect in the increasingly hot afternoon. We watched 7 or 8 groups come through the cycle and marveled as 13 out of 15 players bogeyed the par-3 16th (yes, the same hole I virtually hit to one foot of. GOD I'M COOL. Phew, sorry about that).
After a full day of golf I peeled off of a business dinner and enjoyed a solo meal at an excellent Pittsburgher restaurant called Cafe Zao. I sat at the bar and read the last few chapters of Richard Ford's The Lay of the Land as a very kind bartender filled two glasses of wine to the absolute brim (thereby equaling approximately 117 restaurant glasses of wine). Wandered home tipsy and fell right to sleep (ergo the delayed post).
Another great day in West PA.
Today was, no surprise here, awesome as shit.
Day four for me (two for the Open) started with the 8:00 AM shuttle to Oakmont. Given that most of the big players (and I'm not just talking about Phil's chest... HEY-OH!) had later starting times, the traffic was mercifully light on the way in.
When we got to the course (we being myself and Al from Team One), we swung by the Lexus consumer tent. Proving to be a massive hit with attendees, the tent includes the opportunity to have your picture taken with the absurdly expensive replica of the Championship Cup I referenced on Day 2 and an absolutely awesome virtual version of Oakmont's par-3 #6 (Here's a bonus pic from earlier in the week).
Both features have drawn long lines all week. But early enough in the morning, we were able to take a swing at the par-3 without standing in line for an hour. Al went first and hit the ball to a very respectable 11 feet. I was next and what happened next is yet another sad, sad case of all my glory being virtual. My ball sailed into the green, rolled by the cup (missing an ace by what looked like an inch) and then checking up and rolling back to just inside 12 inches. The resulting roar of the assembled attendees brought people running over and turned me into an instant golf celeb. It was pretty awesome. The Lexus tent employees raced over to collect my info for the end-of-day prize. It pained me mightily to inform them I'd concepted the tent activities and was thereby disqualified from winning. SHIT! But it was a pretty heady few minutes.
I spent the rest of the day cruising around the course and periodically making my way back to the Lexus luxury tent for water, AC and frozen fruit bars. Al, Paul and I found a perfect secret-squirrel spot between #'s 6 and 7 that let us watch the drives off of 4, approaches and putts on 5, the entire #6 and drives on 7. Absolutely perfect in the increasingly hot afternoon. We watched 7 or 8 groups come through the cycle and marveled as 13 out of 15 players bogeyed the par-3 16th (yes, the same hole I virtually hit to one foot of. GOD I'M COOL. Phew, sorry about that).
After a full day of golf I peeled off of a business dinner and enjoyed a solo meal at an excellent Pittsburgher restaurant called Cafe Zao. I sat at the bar and read the last few chapters of Richard Ford's The Lay of the Land as a very kind bartender filled two glasses of wine to the absolute brim (thereby equaling approximately 117 restaurant glasses of wine). Wandered home tipsy and fell right to sleep (ergo the delayed post).
Another great day in West PA.
Oakmont - Day Four (coming soon)
Update coming very soon. It's 75% done, but I have to run to catch a shuttle bus.
Sorry, but stay tuned for personal golf glory, up close and personal Tiger time and a pretty wickedly great dinner.
Off to Day 5 now...
Sorry, but stay tuned for personal golf glory, up close and personal Tiger time and a pretty wickedly great dinner.
Off to Day 5 now...
Thursday, June 14, 2007
Oakmont - Day Three
Hey there... No pictures from today because no cameras are allowed on the course during actual Championship play, which happened to start this morning. Aw-Yeah!
So I got to the course just in time to see Nick Watney tee of. Which was a good thing since my job for the day was to follow him around and take notes on his every shot for a potential online feature. The only problem with the plan was that I ended up taking notes on more shots than he or I (or the online feature's potential) would have liked. I took 25 pages of notes, but all for naught. Though it was pretty awesome to do.
Nick ended up with a 9-over for the first round. But watching him play, it all came down to two hole, #4 and #5. Walking the course with a single player and actually noting down his every shot was a pretty amazing way to watch the first round. You get an incredible sense of how impossibly difficult this course really is. Watney started the day off on #10 and scrambled a bit but played really well on his first eight holes. The highlight of the front (back technically) was #15. Nick sent his drive right (an issue all day) and into a pit of a fairway bunker. He was pretty deep in the bunker and the lip caught his second shot and left it only a few yards in front of the trap and still more than 200 yards out from the green. His third shot was fairly epic though as he muscled the ball out of the deep, deep Oakmont rough and bounced it up onto the green. He then sunk the high-pressure 8-footer for a huge par save. Pretty awesome stuff to see, especially standing next to his very sweet mom. Nick ran into trouble he couldn't muscle out of on the front though, posting a double bogey at #4, a triple at #5 and bogeys again at 7 and 8. That quickly the round got away from him - None of it resulting from shots that were truly awful. He just couldn't keep his drives on the fairway and here, at this course, that means big trouble.
After Nick's round I hung out at the Lexus tent and watched a few groups pass through #3. Then I ended the day following Phil Mickelson, Adam Scott and Jim Furyk for a few holes. All in all, an awesome Thursday.
Or at least it was until I got stuck listening to a complete d-bag drone on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on about saltwater fishing for the entire hour ride. He would not shut up and it is impossible to communicate how annoying he was without duplicating his hillbilly accent and giving you a 20-minute dissertation on walk-around vs center console boats and Suzuki 300 hp outboards.
DEAR GOD!
Anyway, off to bed now. I'll write more tomorrow. Tiger's just three shots off the lead... We'll see what happens on an even drier course.
Here is a bonus photo from the first couple days...
So I got to the course just in time to see Nick Watney tee of. Which was a good thing since my job for the day was to follow him around and take notes on his every shot for a potential online feature. The only problem with the plan was that I ended up taking notes on more shots than he or I (or the online feature's potential) would have liked. I took 25 pages of notes, but all for naught. Though it was pretty awesome to do.
Nick ended up with a 9-over for the first round. But watching him play, it all came down to two hole, #4 and #5. Walking the course with a single player and actually noting down his every shot was a pretty amazing way to watch the first round. You get an incredible sense of how impossibly difficult this course really is. Watney started the day off on #10 and scrambled a bit but played really well on his first eight holes. The highlight of the front (back technically) was #15. Nick sent his drive right (an issue all day) and into a pit of a fairway bunker. He was pretty deep in the bunker and the lip caught his second shot and left it only a few yards in front of the trap and still more than 200 yards out from the green. His third shot was fairly epic though as he muscled the ball out of the deep, deep Oakmont rough and bounced it up onto the green. He then sunk the high-pressure 8-footer for a huge par save. Pretty awesome stuff to see, especially standing next to his very sweet mom. Nick ran into trouble he couldn't muscle out of on the front though, posting a double bogey at #4, a triple at #5 and bogeys again at 7 and 8. That quickly the round got away from him - None of it resulting from shots that were truly awful. He just couldn't keep his drives on the fairway and here, at this course, that means big trouble.
After Nick's round I hung out at the Lexus tent and watched a few groups pass through #3. Then I ended the day following Phil Mickelson, Adam Scott and Jim Furyk for a few holes. All in all, an awesome Thursday.
Or at least it was until I got stuck listening to a complete d-bag drone on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on about saltwater fishing for the entire hour ride. He would not shut up and it is impossible to communicate how annoying he was without duplicating his hillbilly accent and giving you a 20-minute dissertation on walk-around vs center console boats and Suzuki 300 hp outboards.
DEAR GOD!
Anyway, off to bed now. I'll write more tomorrow. Tiger's just three shots off the lead... We'll see what happens on an even drier course.
Here is a bonus photo from the first couple days...
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
Oakmont - Day Two
So today was a little crazy. But only in a golf sort of way.
First things first, in a sad attempt to make up for a night of Iron Cities and Fish N Chips, I started the day of with a hangover-busting 10 mile run. Want to know what's even harder to find around here than vegetarian food at PNC? Runners, that's what. There's an awesome river trail on the north shore of the Allegheny and for just over an hour this morning, I had it entirely to myself. Seriously, I didn't see another soul. Kind of weird.
After that I headed over to the course with the goal of actually watching some golf. And I succeeded. I'm awesome like that. I walked the outer route on the full 18 and I think this course is going to grind up the field. There isn't a hole or pin that looks anything close to easy. Absent of the rains this afternoon (and more on that in just a bit) I think the predictions of a winning score at 4 or 5 over may be dead on.
I watched a bunch of the golfers work out of the bunkers and from every conceivable place on the torturous greens. Here's '94 temporary leader Lee Janzen hitting one of approximately 312,092,615 shots from a bunker on the 15th.
Seeing pro golfers in person really impresses upon you just how amazing these guys are. Shot after shot placed exactly where they want it. I was struck when I watched a group of players at the driving range how every single ball was right on the yardage greens. There were literally no stray balls in the middle of the range. It's just so different than the way most of us play. I shoot for an area and am thrilled when I hit anywhere near it. They shoot for a specific spot and are totally pissed when they miss it by a few feet. It's pretty damn impressive live.
After that I went to the Lexus tent (which I have an admittedly vested interest in) and got my picture taken with an absurdly expensive replica of the US Open Championship Cup. People were lined up forever to take the pictures and then download them at, you guessed it, MyOwnPursuit.com. Here's a thoroughly disheveled me and the Cup.
After that (and by "that" you should understand 6 hours of hoofing it around Oakmont) I dropped way too much money at the merchandise tent (and by "tent" you should understand county-sized tented space) then finally hopped on the shuttle bus to head back to my car. And just in damn time. As I walked from the bus to my car, I watched a wall of black clouds descend on the greater Pittsburgh area. Their arrival was slightly preceded by crazy winds that knocked over trees and pushed one pissed off Penn. State Trooper onto his ass. They were followed by the craziest storm I've seen in years. It poured rain on a biblical level for well over an hour. I sat in my rented Forrester and cringed as popcorn-sized hail pounded the windshield and hundreds of lightning bolts struck the surrounding woods. It was a little ma nature version of shock and awe. And I was. Here is a not-remotely-conveying-of-the-raw-power photo of the fury.
I'm really interested to see how the storm impacts tomorrow's play. Obviously the greens will be softened up considerably so scores could be artificially low in the morning. If things stay dry tomorrow, the early rounds versus the later starts will have a distinct advantage.
My job tomorrow, follow Lexus-sponsored pro, Nick Watney on his first US Open round ever. If things go interestingly, look for a hole-by-hole blog at, you guessed it, MyOwnPursuit.com. If not, look for a much less official posting here.
Wait, I hear Iron Cities calling my name. Though they could just be cheering for the Steelers. Better investigate...
First things first, in a sad attempt to make up for a night of Iron Cities and Fish N Chips, I started the day of with a hangover-busting 10 mile run. Want to know what's even harder to find around here than vegetarian food at PNC? Runners, that's what. There's an awesome river trail on the north shore of the Allegheny and for just over an hour this morning, I had it entirely to myself. Seriously, I didn't see another soul. Kind of weird.
After that I headed over to the course with the goal of actually watching some golf. And I succeeded. I'm awesome like that. I walked the outer route on the full 18 and I think this course is going to grind up the field. There isn't a hole or pin that looks anything close to easy. Absent of the rains this afternoon (and more on that in just a bit) I think the predictions of a winning score at 4 or 5 over may be dead on.
I watched a bunch of the golfers work out of the bunkers and from every conceivable place on the torturous greens. Here's '94 temporary leader Lee Janzen hitting one of approximately 312,092,615 shots from a bunker on the 15th.
Seeing pro golfers in person really impresses upon you just how amazing these guys are. Shot after shot placed exactly where they want it. I was struck when I watched a group of players at the driving range how every single ball was right on the yardage greens. There were literally no stray balls in the middle of the range. It's just so different than the way most of us play. I shoot for an area and am thrilled when I hit anywhere near it. They shoot for a specific spot and are totally pissed when they miss it by a few feet. It's pretty damn impressive live.
After that I went to the Lexus tent (which I have an admittedly vested interest in) and got my picture taken with an absurdly expensive replica of the US Open Championship Cup. People were lined up forever to take the pictures and then download them at, you guessed it, MyOwnPursuit.com. Here's a thoroughly disheveled me and the Cup.
After that (and by "that" you should understand 6 hours of hoofing it around Oakmont) I dropped way too much money at the merchandise tent (and by "tent" you should understand county-sized tented space) then finally hopped on the shuttle bus to head back to my car. And just in damn time. As I walked from the bus to my car, I watched a wall of black clouds descend on the greater Pittsburgh area. Their arrival was slightly preceded by crazy winds that knocked over trees and pushed one pissed off Penn. State Trooper onto his ass. They were followed by the craziest storm I've seen in years. It poured rain on a biblical level for well over an hour. I sat in my rented Forrester and cringed as popcorn-sized hail pounded the windshield and hundreds of lightning bolts struck the surrounding woods. It was a little ma nature version of shock and awe. And I was. Here is a not-remotely-conveying-of-the-raw-power photo of the fury.
I'm really interested to see how the storm impacts tomorrow's play. Obviously the greens will be softened up considerably so scores could be artificially low in the morning. If things stay dry tomorrow, the early rounds versus the later starts will have a distinct advantage.
My job tomorrow, follow Lexus-sponsored pro, Nick Watney on his first US Open round ever. If things go interestingly, look for a hole-by-hole blog at, you guessed it, MyOwnPursuit.com. If not, look for a much less official posting here.
Wait, I hear Iron Cities calling my name. Though they could just be cheering for the Steelers. Better investigate...
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
Bonus Day One Magic...
Oakmont's incredible Club House.
Marketing dollars well spent. Proof-reading dollars, not so much.
Oakmont - Day One
Hey all. First, let me say that after years of watching the Browns fold to the Steelers I was predisposed to hate it here. I was wrong. Pittsburgh is pretty fucking cool. First of all, the city is really nice looking and the surrounding county is gorgeous. Okay, enough Pitt love. Moving on.
Today I didn't get to watch all that much golf, but we did shoot photos for an upcoming print campaign in Golf World. Our subjects included head Oakmont Pro, Bob Ford...Oakmont Superintendent, John Zimmers...Oakmont Mayor, the Honorable Robert Fescemeyer...Oakmont Consulting Architect, Tom Marzolf...and Oakmont 1973 Superstar, Johnny Miller. Um wow. Quite a day. After interviewing all these folks (plus a bunch more) over the last few weeks, actually meeting them was awesome. To a person, they were awesome (Raymond Floyd to be discussed in a separate, beer-fueled session).
It was a great day. Perfect weather, stunning course, great people, multiple missions accomplished.* Tomorrow I'm back to the course for the last day of practice rounds and a bit more focused golf fandom.
But wait! After the game I continued Pittsburgh sports extravaganza continued with a 7:05 first pitch in the timeless Pirates/Rangers rivalry.
First off, PNC Park is the shit. Gorgeous setting for baseball. Reminds me of Safeco, but without the roof and with far better landmark orientation. Very open feel and an amazing site for less-than-amazing baseball.
Empowered by multiple Iron City lagers (HEY-OH!) I took a bold, bold step for me and ventured in the world of fried dinner. Allow me to state for the record that the PNC Fish and (NOT "'N") Chips are worth every single cent of their $6.75 price. They were perhaps the best Fish N' Chips I've ever had — putting them in the top two. Their greatness was matched only by the hair of the woman serving them. IT CANNOT BE CONTAINED BY A MERE HAT!
The magic continued as I saw not one, not two, not three, not four, BUT FIVE dudes in American flag shirts! Hells yeah. I guess.
Bucs 7, Rangers 5. Me...1,000,000.
Loving you, Pittsburgh.
Tune in tomorrow. Oh and enter the extended Caption Contest. Sheesh!
Oh and go to MyOwnPursuit.com.
*And not in the premature aircraft-carrier-landing sense.
Today I didn't get to watch all that much golf, but we did shoot photos for an upcoming print campaign in Golf World. Our subjects included head Oakmont Pro, Bob Ford...Oakmont Superintendent, John Zimmers...Oakmont Mayor, the Honorable Robert Fescemeyer...Oakmont Consulting Architect, Tom Marzolf...and Oakmont 1973 Superstar, Johnny Miller. Um wow. Quite a day. After interviewing all these folks (plus a bunch more) over the last few weeks, actually meeting them was awesome. To a person, they were awesome (Raymond Floyd to be discussed in a separate, beer-fueled session).
It was a great day. Perfect weather, stunning course, great people, multiple missions accomplished.* Tomorrow I'm back to the course for the last day of practice rounds and a bit more focused golf fandom.
But wait! After the game I continued Pittsburgh sports extravaganza continued with a 7:05 first pitch in the timeless Pirates/Rangers rivalry.
First off, PNC Park is the shit. Gorgeous setting for baseball. Reminds me of Safeco, but without the roof and with far better landmark orientation. Very open feel and an amazing site for less-than-amazing baseball. Empowered by multiple Iron City lagers (HEY-OH!) I took a bold, bold step for me and ventured in the world of fried dinner. Allow me to state for the record that the PNC Fish and (NOT "'N") Chips are worth every single cent of their $6.75 price. They were perhaps the best Fish N' Chips I've ever had — putting them in the top two. Their greatness was matched only by the hair of the woman serving them. IT CANNOT BE CONTAINED BY A MERE HAT!
The magic continued as I saw not one, not two, not three, not four, BUT FIVE dudes in American flag shirts! Hells yeah. I guess.
Bucs 7, Rangers 5. Me...1,000,000.
Loving you, Pittsburgh.
Tune in tomorrow. Oh and enter the extended Caption Contest. Sheesh!
Oh and go to MyOwnPursuit.com.
*And not in the premature aircraft-carrier-landing sense.
Monday, June 11, 2007
After months and months of work...
Our Lexus golf site is up. Check it out for yourself.
It may not look like much (though I'd beg to differ) but it's the first time that the USGA has shared their handicap database. It's the first time Golf Channel and Golf Digest have come together. And it's the first time the USGA has partnered (even if indirectly) with either of them.
I'm really excited about it. And it will only get better over the next few months as more content arrives from our new partners.
Hope you like it.
I'm on-course at Oakmont starting tomorrow! Be still my golf-loving heart. Be still your judgments as well, eh.
It may not look like much (though I'd beg to differ) but it's the first time that the USGA has shared their handicap database. It's the first time Golf Channel and Golf Digest have come together. And it's the first time the USGA has partnered (even if indirectly) with either of them.
I'm really excited about it. And it will only get better over the next few months as more content arrives from our new partners.
Hope you like it.
I'm on-course at Oakmont starting tomorrow! Be still my golf-loving heart. Be still your judgments as well, eh.
One quick thing...
I, for one, thought the Sopranos finale was awesome. Without spoiling anything (SPOILER ALERT), it was the first time the series went past showing us Tony's life to showing us what it's like to live Tony's life. That's the most tension I've ever felt watching something. And that's what it's like to be him. Every day.
Awesome stuff.
More on this soon.
Awesome stuff.
Week 61, same as Week 60
No new cartoon from the New Yorker this week, so we'll extend Week 60 for 7 more days.
I'll start post some US Open updates as soon as I get there. Pittsburgh here I come!
Write to you soon.
I'll start post some US Open updates as soon as I get there. Pittsburgh here I come!
Write to you soon.
Friday, June 08, 2007
Oh by the way
In the midst of all the other insanity of the last few weeks, we're also moving (I'd say that approximately 75% of it was the unfathomably loud squeaking floor from the apartment above us). In fact our new lease starts today (though we're going to stretch the pain of moving out for the rest of the month). I'd tell you exactly where we're headed, but we both know you'd probably rob us. I will tell you this though. Our new neighborhood is called Los Feliz and, for some reason, it's pronounced Los Feelez. Yeah, no idea.
Here's the official neighborhood Web site. I'm incredibly charmed by its lack of polish.
Here's the official neighborhood Web site. I'm incredibly charmed by its lack of polish.
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
I'd heard nothing about this movie until right now
That in no way prevents me from now breathlessly anticipating it.
See if you agree.*
*More with my anticipation than with my statement. Can't really say I give a shit about that part.
See if you agree.*
*More with my anticipation than with my statement. Can't really say I give a shit about that part.
What I'm doing instead of writing amazing blog posts
Though why would I start now you might ask. Oh you! By which I mean, quit being such an asshole. The other day I mentioned that I'm working on a big golf project for Lexus. It's a very cool assignment and it's involved tons of interesting background work. This is probably a good point to mention that I'm a huge golf fan so "interesting" may be a relative term. Anyway, one of the best things I've gotten to do is a series of interviews with people connected to the US Open. I'll give you more details as the work gets closer to coming out, but yesterday I got to spend a half hour on the phone asking Johnny Miller about his 1973 Open win at Oakmont. Pretty damn thrilling for me. And next week I'll be in Oakmont working on the project onsite. In this case thrilling falls a little short.
And yes, I will probably be wearing plaid pants.
My plan is to blog the event as much as I can. Post about the action on the course, who I watched, who I got to interview. Stay tuned. In the meantime brush up on your US Open history at USGA.org. I will make the next week or so more tolerable. Or so I hope.
Tuesday, June 05, 2007
In today's news, I just dropped a bunch of acid
Suddenly Ron Burgandy looks credible and restrained.
Monday, June 04, 2007
The "Pump up the Volume (of Entries)!" Caption Contest, Presented by Ejaculoid - Week 60
Hello again gang. Not exactly sure what happened last week. I'm hoping that the majority of you somehow lost Internet access for the week. And now I'm hoping you got it back.
The entries last week were solid. There were just three times fewer of them than normal. Let's journey back to "normal" this week.
Looks like a good cartoon. I'm posting the contest nice and early on Monday. I'm not offering a shitty prize...
Hopefully this server can handle the sure onslaught of entries about to rain down upon it.
Have 'em in by Sunday night. Keep 'em anonymous.
Best of luck!
The entries last week were solid. There were just three times fewer of them than normal. Let's journey back to "normal" this week.
Looks like a good cartoon. I'm posting the contest nice and early on Monday. I'm not offering a shitty prize...
Hopefully this server can handle the sure onslaught of entries about to rain down upon it.
Have 'em in by Sunday night. Keep 'em anonymous.
Best of luck!
The "Pump up the Volume (of Entries)!" Caption Contest, Presented by Ejaculoid - Week 59 Results
Um, yeah. It's probably not exactly a news flash, but there is no iTunes prize this week. We just missed 50 entries. In much the same way that I just missed a career in the NBA.
I'm going to assume this week was some kind of strange cosmic anomaly. And not a sign that we've somehow jumped back in time to the days that the Caption Contest sucked.
Mindy theorizes that I always get fewer entries when I offer a prize and Mark V. observed that he thinks the prize I offer kind of stinks. Either way, there will be no prize this week.
Since we got fewer entries than the number of finalists I usually select, let's dispense with the long list of almost and take a look at our win, place and show...
SHOW: "... i'm guessing only two of you will laugh at this punchline ..."
PLACE: "Hold on, I'll go get a... shit, this is hard."
And, by three lengths, your WIN: "what happened to the rabbi and the irishman?"
Nice work, Anonymous. Send me a note and I'll hype your comic genius to the masses.
I'm going to assume this week was some kind of strange cosmic anomaly. And not a sign that we've somehow jumped back in time to the days that the Caption Contest sucked.
Mindy theorizes that I always get fewer entries when I offer a prize and Mark V. observed that he thinks the prize I offer kind of stinks. Either way, there will be no prize this week.
Since we got fewer entries than the number of finalists I usually select, let's dispense with the long list of almost and take a look at our win, place and show...
SHOW: "... i'm guessing only two of you will laugh at this punchline ..."
PLACE: "Hold on, I'll go get a... shit, this is hard."
And, by three lengths, your WIN: "what happened to the rabbi and the irishman?"
Nice work, Anonymous. Send me a note and I'll hype your comic genius to the masses.
Sunday, June 03, 2007
Fair warning
They say excuses are like assholes because everybody has one. That seems unnecessarily broad for my tastes. So how's this instead, excuses are like nutsacks because approximately half of everybody has one...
Yeah, I like that better. So here's my nutsack if you will.* The last couple of weeks have been crazy-ass busy. As you've no doubt noted, my blog posts have been short and oftentimes link-heavy. Sorry about that.
Unfortunately this next week is going to be even busier. I've been working on a very cool freelance project that involves building and launching a new Web site for Lexus's partnership with the USGA and then doing a corresponding 10-page print campaign. The site launches Thursday and I'm off to the US Open this next weekend to finish the print up. It's been a little insane. But enough about me.
I'll do my best to post a few interesting items this week.** But my preemptive apologies if this week is a little light on content. By the way this would be the perfect time for you to submit a guest post... Yes, I'm looking at you.
Talk to you soon.
*And I don't blame you at all if you won't.
**I'll save you the time, "Why start now?" Ha! You kill me!
Yeah, I like that better. So here's my nutsack if you will.* The last couple of weeks have been crazy-ass busy. As you've no doubt noted, my blog posts have been short and oftentimes link-heavy. Sorry about that.
Unfortunately this next week is going to be even busier. I've been working on a very cool freelance project that involves building and launching a new Web site for Lexus's partnership with the USGA and then doing a corresponding 10-page print campaign. The site launches Thursday and I'm off to the US Open this next weekend to finish the print up. It's been a little insane. But enough about me.
I'll do my best to post a few interesting items this week.** But my preemptive apologies if this week is a little light on content. By the way this would be the perfect time for you to submit a guest post... Yes, I'm looking at you.
Talk to you soon.
*And I don't blame you at all if you won't.
**I'll save you the time, "Why start now?" Ha! You kill me!
What if instead of poorly describing a Hold Steady show...
I just linked to a YouTube video of one of their performances?
Good call.
Good call.
Friday, June 01, 2007
The Hold Steady at the El Rey - 5/31/07
So one night after I was forced to skip Arcade Fire at the Greek Theatre in favor of working (don't worry, Mindy and Mark V used the tickets and further solidified the foundation for their inevitable affair), I was more amped up than usual to see Craig Finn and the crew rock the awesome El Rey. And I wasn't disappointed.My love for and of the band is well established. But unlike the last time I saw them play live, it seems as though the gospel has spread far and wide. By the time the Hold Steady went on at 10:30 (following a cool, but inconsistent set by a fascinating Portland band called Blitzen Tracker and a consistently lame set by an annoying band from Pennsylvania called Illinois [I KNOW!]) the room was completely packed. The crowd was an interesting mix of LA hipsters (just like regular hipsters, but with more expensive ironic clothing), LA fratsters (just like regular fratsters, only they actually surf instead of just pretending to) and cool semi celebs (what's up brothers Corddry?).
But what the crowd lacked in homogeneity (other than being white, 24-35 and upper middle class) they made up for in enthusiasm. Boys and Girls in America ended 2006 at the top of tons of highly influential best-of lists. Midway through 2007 (I KNOW!) they're playing in front of crowds who not only know all the songs, but dig them enough to sing key parts and raise fists and bop heads for big guitar and drum flourishes. There are a lot of shows where this would be annoying as shit, but with a band as earnest, animated and unadulteratedly rockin' as Hold Steady, it actually kind of works. In fact it totally worked. And it made for a raucous crowd from song one (in this case, "Stuck Between Stations"). Like at any good show, the energy flowed back and forth between the crowd and the band.
And as a result, the band was very keyed up. Just a few nights removed from the friendly, but tiny, confines of Boise's Neumos, the guys were clearly excited to be playing a legendary room in a big-ass city (though I suspect they put just as much into their Boise, Omaha and Grand Rapids shows, that's kind of their thing).
If you haven't seen the Hold Steady play live before it's a pretty unique experience. Craig Finn performs the bejesus out of his songs. He sort of acts out key parts, vamps for the crowd and mouths the previous lyric as he moves about the stage and prepares to attack the mic again. It's much, much cooler than it sounds and it's utterly infectious. "You have to see them live" is as much of a curse for bands as it is a recommendation, but Hold Steady has earned the praise and seems determined to deliver on a nightly basis. The result is a crowd that's 100% engaged from song one (in this case Stuck Between Stations).
And the rest of the band was just as committed to putting on a great show. Guitarist Tad Kubler pretty much looks like a serial killer and absolutely murders on the six string (HEY-OH!)(yeah, sorry about that). He's squarely old-school in his approach to lead guitar - lots of big soloing and intricate fret work. And as much as I may not like that kind of playing in general it's all good in context as punctuations between Finn's epic narratives. All the gooder when Kubler hurls his guitar around his body by the strap in mid-song fervor.
Bobby Drake's drum work was, as always, solid, if a bit hidden in the live show. Franz Nicolay's keyboards, harmonica and accordion take a backseat only to his silent-film-villain mustache and straight-from-the-bottle wine quaffing. The unsung MVP of the live show just might have been bassist Galen Polivka. His intricate rhythms drove the performance and ended up anchoring things even more than the drums. Polivka also provided my favorite moment of last night's show when he took his wallet out in the middle of "Massive Nights" and tossed cash into the crowd with a pronounced look of meta superiority.
So...great crowd, great performance, now what about the music? The set list would be the only mild complaint I had from last night (though that's probably putting it a bit strongly). The 1:30 show was dominated by songs off of the newest album, Boys and Girls in America. It's a great album and it was clear that the audience was most familiar with (and audibly psyched for) its songs. But for those of us who fell in love with the band on '04's ...Almost Killed Me, there was little reward for the loyalty. Like I said, no biggie, but come on give a guy a "The Swish!" Lots of good stuff off of Separation Sunday ("Killer Parties" "Cattle and the Creeping Things" "Your Little Hoodrat Friend," you get the idea). And, as I said, we got pretty much all of Boys and Girls. "First Night" remains my favorite song off of the album and is even better live. The moment at the end when it transitions from slow, sweet ballad to aggressive guitar and shout is the pure stuff of awesome. Much like my description of said moment.
All in all one of the best I've been to down here in LA. And seeing Har Mar Superstar in the crowd sure as hell didn't hurt.
Need I even suggest that you seek the band out if and when they head your way? Because I do. Suggest it I mean. See the question was supposed to be... oh fuck it, never mind.
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